Life is crazy! Not just here at the Zion Family Homestead. Life in general. Just when you think you’ve got it all under control, BAM! It’s spiraling out of that same control. Or perhaps it’s just that control is only an imaginary concept. And I am quite silly for even thinking it’s something that I could have!
Control, to Have or Not to Have…
Let me give you some examples of how I thought life was something I could have control of. So Papa and I shared our 15th wedding anniversary by celebrating it at a hotel in Puyallup, WA! Part of our celebratory plan was to set our yearly goals. Now don’t go thinking that’s where we went wrong. That’s not where we ‘lost’ control. Nope, that went off just as planned! It was an amazing night. So much good talk of our dreams, hopes, and goals. So much love and fun ensued. We are so blessed to have had these past 15 years, and we are even more blessed to have the opportunity of spending eternity together!
Nope, as I said, that wasn’t where we lost that control. Nope, not at all. Our control spiraled into craziness when we got back! When we returned to real life ™.
A Little History
So, JUST before our little mini vacay, we were prompted for Papa to go back to work to help build our savings account back up. To help support our family’s moving business. That nebulous control we most obviously did NOT have first reared its ugly head by showing us how trying to work two jobs is QUITE the undertaking.
It also showed us that we could not keep our callings as Seminary Teachers since Papa was working grave a couple of nights a week. That about broke poor Papa’s heart, he loves the youth of the church. And he loves teaching. While he’s amazing at both, he just doesn’t have the time now that he had only weeks before that fateful day.
I have changed my waking hours to coincide with Papa’s because I dislike, very intensely, being awake while he sleeps. This is always something I have done. I get all pouty whenever he tries to take a nap and I’m not tired. Well, not ALL the time, but quite often. I just don’t want him sleeping when he could be spending time with me! Call me selfish.
Anyway, as I was saying, I’m staying awake when he’s at work. And since I’m doing this, it means – for some unknown reason – I’m dog tired at night. I have NO energy. I can stay awake, I just can’t seem to want to do anything other than nonsensical things.
So what’s the point of all this, you ask?
ALL of our wonderful scheduling, goals, etc. have gone out the window! We used to get up every morning and set the tone for our day. No more. It’s like if we can’t get up in the morning – first thing – there’s no sense in planning anything! I just don’t get it.
We used to do the blog perfectly. Not anymore. This is the first blog post I’ve written in weeks. Perfection is the only one who’s been on target, and she was the one who least wanted to do it in the beginning. See how perfect she is? Obviously, she doesn’t get it from her Mama!!! 😉
Combined with all this, working two jobs, changing sleep schedules around – is that accident we had on my birthday. When we were rear-ended. We still have to see the chiropractor twice a week for adjustments and massage. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love, love, LOVE my weekly massages, Michelle is amazing! However, it’s still a huge time block investment keeping us away from things we need to do here on the homestead.
Anyway, Zion Family Homestead is Here to Stay.
I aim to get back on track. To work with my Heavenly Father with what He want’s for me to do. For us to do. As I was writing this post, I realized that’s where I went wrong. I don’t have control. I never had any control. None of us actually has any control. We need to realize life is all under God’s control. And if we want to be happy, perhaps to feel as if we have control, we need to realize we really don’t have it. We need to realize we have to work with God. To remember it’s all His. To make His will our own. And if we can do this. If we can work with Him, we are going to be so much happier.
So this means you will have more Zion Family Homestead goodness to read. Still get those delicious recipes from Perfection and some healthy options from me. I will continue to share my love of crochet with you. Papa will manage to find some time to share more bee stories, experiences, knowledge, and mistakes with you. Handyman will still share about the garden and other fascinations he has with life on the homestead.
We are here to stay. I hope you will stick around with us as we work on becoming self-sufficient, together!